Love and romance will not always feel like a fairy tale.
No matter what you heard about marriage, being actually married will still have a surprise or two for you, especially in the early stages.
This is not strange; marriage is different from relationships, and many couples have reported that things felt a little weird at first, but with time, things got straightened out.
Tara Fela-Durotoye, the CEO of House of Tara, who has been married to Fela Durotoye for more than a decade explains three things new couples need to look out for in marriage.
1. You won’t always feel in love
The key word here being feel. Speaking in an exclusive interview with Pulse, Tara says, people “go into marriage thinking that the feeling they had [when they just met their spouse] will forever stay that way, but they don’t realise that there are times when it’s not there.”
The mistake young couples make when this happens is to assume they are no longer in love with each other and end the marriage.
According to the mother of three, couples are meant to reignite the feeling of love they had at the very beginning of their marriage and there are ways to go about this.
One of the ways is to ask questions from other couples who have been married for long, and ask what they did when they got to this phase.
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2. Keep the sex and chemistry alive
This is one of the ways ensuring that the love never and passion never dies in the marriage. Mrs. Fela-Durotoye believes that even though the sex and romantic side of the marriage will be lit at the beginning, there will come a point in the marriage where interest in sex will really dwindle.
“Sometimes when women marry, they start having children, they start losing interest in the sex,” Tara says.
This should not be allowed to happen, and in her exact words, spouses need to “take their lives back.”
The sex, romance and chemistry should never be allowed to die.
3. Learn not to focus on weaknesses
Tara Fela-Durotoye also believes that newly-married couple need to be watchful, so as not to fall into the mistake of concentrating on their partner’s weaknesses, instead of being focused on the great things about them.
According to her, “God built us with strengths, and sometimes our strengths are overdone, they become weaknesses. A lot of times, we focus on the weaknesses.
“And when you focus on someone’s weaknesses; the more weaknesses you see, the more you dislike them” she adds.
Watch Tara advice new couples in the the clip below.
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EnterGhana.com | Credit: Pulse.com.ng | Just Married: Tara Fela-Durotoye shares 3 most important tips for newly-weds